KarMel
Scholarship 2008
|
Personal
Story “Carrie” By Autumn
Knight |
Desciption of Submission: “Personal Narrative about my experience working with
my first trangender student and how that
student has inspired my life and my educational
work.” - Autumn
|
For the past two years I have facilitated
theatre-based workshops with Houston LGBTQ youth. The organization I work
with provides a safe space to meet and build relationships with other LGBTQ
youth, receive information about LGBT resources, and gain access to other
educational opportunities. I first encountered this advocacy group when I
invited them to speak to my middle school students about queer identity in my
former position as an after school program director. I later approached the
director about providing her students with a theatrical outlet for self
expression in a contained, comfortable environment. Though all of the youth
were overwhelmingly brilliant, articulate, creative and vocal, there was one
that particularly outstanding. *Carrie was unique, not only because she was, at
that time, the group’s only male-to-female transgendered student, but because
she possessed a rare confidence. Her distinct presence was derived more from
her personality than from her marginalized position within a profoundly
marginalized population. Carrie was near the beginning to middle of her
transition. She was tall, intimidating almost, with wild hair that was too
long and too short at the same time. She still had the solid thickness of the
body she was born into; every time we met, her football player frame was
crammed into adorable, extremely feminine baby-tees in a
effort to establish her girlish-ness. Her voice was squeaky in some spots,
rough in others-her body still undergoing male puberty. In spite of her
exterior awkwardness, she had an enormous capacity to give, to be
opinionated, and to fight for what she believed in. Carrie’s depth truly revealed itself during an
Augusto Boal Forum Theatre exercise. Augusto Boal, a provocative theatre
director, writer, and politician, is the founder of Theatre of the Oppressed,
a political theatrical form used to radicalize individuals and communities to
make changes in their lives. The basis of Forum Theatre is behavioral
analysis through the reenactment of stories offered by workshop participants.
Not surprisingly, Carrie enthusiastically volunteered to share a problematic
incident from her life. In her story, she was discriminated against by one of
her co-workers. When reenacting the story, we noticed that Carrie’s trademark
confrontational nature was jeopardized when she was faced with a potentially
dangerous conflict. In the Forum Theatre exercise, the scene is replayed a
second time the way the storyteller wished it had happened and a third time
with the storyteller playing her offender and another person assuming the
original role. In the last rendition of the verbally abusive co-worker scene,
Carrie learned a lot about human motivations and intentions by embodying her
offender. Though she was still hurt by her co-workers comments about her
gender and sexuality, she was able to investigate potentially why he may have
been are ignorant of or insensitive to LGBTQ issues. Our post-activity discussion was useful and
enlightening for all present, even the student who felt slightly uncomfortable
portraying Carrie’s transgenderedness –which Carrie handled with the utmost
grace and understanding. Carrie later informed the program director that the
exercise exposed the ways in which she had been discriminating against her own
friend who was a female-to-male transgendered person. In response, she
apologized to her friend and became more aware of her own contribution to
queer on queer (verbal) violence and harassment. Shortly after this Carrie and her family moved away
to another city. One of the last memories I have of Carrie is watching her in
a stern yet tender manner, assist a new transgender male-to-female student fill
out the paperwork required to join the group. Carrie quickly took the student
under her wings-telling her about resources for transgendered people and
making sure the new student demanded that others refer to her by the correct gender-identifying
pronoun. Fortunately, I didn’t have much of a problem with that when I first
encountered Carrie. Though she demanded respect from everyone, she was
patient and kind when I or anyone else stumbled in our efforts to understand
transgenderism. I will forever be inspired by Carrie, who I hope will grow up
into a beautiful, prosperous, and influential young woman. |