KarMel Scholarship 2008

 

Play

“Pushing Society”

By Katrina Records

 

 

Desciption of Submission: “A one act play following the path of, 17 year old, Sara as she goes through the journey of coming out to her homophobic  family.” - Katrina

 

 

Characters: 

SARA,            17 year old lesbian

LAUREN,       Sara’s mother

MIKE,              Sara’s Father, Lauren’s husband

DOCTOR,      Sara’s psychiatrist

 

Setting:         Present day household living room, waiting room, and psychiatrist’s office

 

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(Sara, Lauren, and Mike enter. Lauren and Mike sit in the living room. Sara stands, unnoticed by Lauren and Mike, and speaks to the audience.)

 

SARA:            I’m lost. I’m 17 in a world that can’t accept beauty. All beauty is difference. Can’t anyone see? Doesn’t anyone look at things for what they are? Is the human race so biased, so delusional that a frown can’t be seen as a smile in the dark? There is more than one way to look at life. There is more than this. There is so much more than I can understand, more than you can even conceive. We have to be these little copies of the person next to us. Strive for the perfection in similarity! Cry when you don’t look just like that girl you saw on TV. I will not replicate. The viral infection of society cannot touch those immune. I survive; I’ll live for myself. I will appear sad, the outcast alone, lonely for love. In truth I will achieve happiness. I will be strong and content. You will mean nothing to me.

 

LAUREN:       I’m worried about her, Mike. She isn’t like the other kids.

 

MIKE: She’s fine, Lauren.

 

LAUREN:       Emily was never like this. She was the trendsetter. Everyone loved her. She had that great boyfriend, Jon. Emily was involved with the school. She wrote for the school newspaper, was the captain of the girl’s basketball team, and the lead cheerleader!

 

MIKE: I remember.

 

LAUREN:       Her teachers loved her remember how they praised her?

 

MIKE: I remember.

 

LAUREN:       Sara’s teachers call home to tell us that she’s failing, to tell us she hasn’t been doing her work. Did we do something wrong in raising her?

 

MIKE:              We raised them both the same.

 

LAUREN:       We did so well with Emily. How can two sisters be so different?

 

MIKE:              We did well with both of them. She isn’t Emily, but that is expected. No siblings are the same. Kids have different interests. Emily was a great kid, but she wasn’t perfect. I wish she were home more. We never saw her much. She was always busy with others and activities. We never could have a family dinner—

 

LAUREN:       Thanksgiving and Christmas--

 

MIKE:              Other than Thanksgiving and Christmas. Even then it was just dinner. The day was never for the family. Sara is around. She eats dinner with us. She spends the holidays with us. I adore that about her.

           

LAUREN:       You’re right. I just worry about her not socializing at all. I want her to get the most out of high school. I think we may need to have someone talk to her.

 

MIKE:              What do you mean?

 

LAUREN:       I think she needs, or at least would benefit from… professional help.

 

MIKE:              I don’t know what to think about that. It’s not like there is anything wrong with her. It might scare her. I have this feeling that she is going to get stubborn. She might not even talk.

 

LAUREN:       (Distressed.) Why don’t you understand? I want what’s best for her.

 

MIKE:              So do I.

 

LAUREN:       She needs help! I’m going to give it to her.

 

MIKE:              Okay…it may help. Who knows? I can’t say that I would have thought of it, but let’s see what happens.

 

LAUREN:       (Beaming.) I knew you would understand.

 

SARA:            (Still unnoticed by Lauren and Mike. She speaks straight to the audience.) They think I don’t know. All she wants is me to be Emily. But I’m not Emily. My parents don’t know about something. I am afraid how they would react. I do have, well, basically a girlfriend. How could I tell my parents?  Her name is Molly and she’s great. We started off just as friends, but grew closer and closer. It’s beyond my ability to express how things went from there. Love? Can anyone really get the meaning across in such a commonly used word? Can’t anyone see what I mean?

 

LAUREN:       SARA! CAN YOU COME DOWN HERE WE NEED TO TALK TO YOU!

 

SARA:            COMING MOTHER. (To audience,) Here we go! (Sara moves to the living space. She remains standing.)

 

LAUREN:       Want to take a seat so we can talk? (Sara sits slowly.) Good. Okay, first I want to tell you I love you. Don’t forget that, okay? Okay. Now your father and I have been talking. Frankly we are both concerned. How you are doing in school is enough to make us worry, but there is more than that. You don’t have friends.

 

SARA:            I have a friend.

 

LAUREN:       (ignoring) Have you ever sat down and had a conversation with anyone just because?

 

SARA:            The general masses of peers in my school are intellectually impaired.

 

LAUREN:       You are very quick to judge. You might find that people aren’t as bad as you think. 

 

SARA:                        That’s not what I go to school for.

 

LAUREN:       See! You don’t give people a chance! How can you make any friends when you take everyone for idiots? You are so stubborn! Is it that you don’t want friends? What are you gaining from being a loner?

           

SARA:            Well this conversation is over. (Stands up to leave)

 

LAUREN:       Sit down!

 

SARA:            Dad?

 

MIKE:              Sit. You need to hear all of what your mother is saying. (Sara sits back down angrily)

 

LAUREN:       Right, you need to hear this.  I’ve made an appointment for you to see a therapist. You need to talk to someone. You can’t go on the way things are.

 

SARA:            I knew it. You know when you are screaming at each other in the other room I can hear you, right? This is so unfair! I’m not insane! Just because I’m not Emily doesn’t mean that I need ‘help!’

 

LARUEN:       Maybe you should be more like Emily. She never gave us this kind of trouble!

 

SARA:            Sorry I’m not out doing drugs and getting STDs.

 

LAUREN:       Do NOT talk about your sister that way! She would never!

 

SARA:            Shows how much you know!

 

MIKE: ENOUGH! Knock it off both of you!

 

LAUREN:       Your first appointment is next Thursday at noon. I’ll pick you up at school. This is the end of the conversation. (Lauren gets up and Mike exit.)

 

SARA:            (Sara calls after her mother) I knew something like this was going to happen. You can’t accept anything different. You’re just like the rest of the world. I’m a failure in your eyes. (Sara continues sitting there angrily. Lauren addresses audience.)

 

LAUREN:       I DO want her to be more like Emily, but only because Emily has a future. Emily is in college and getting a great start into life. She’s beautiful and is going to land herself a nice husband someday. Sara doesn’t even date…it’s probably a good thing. I don’t want to know what kind of boy she would bring home, (mutters worriedly) if it would be a boy at all. (Lauren shakes off the fear Sara is gay) Hopefully this psychiatrist will fix whatever is wrong with her. I want what the best for her, but obviously I can’t give her that. Hopefully this doctor will be able to help. (Lauren and Sara in the waiting room of the doctor’s office) So…do you know what you are going to talk about with the doctor? (Sara stays silent looking out the window) Are you nervous? (Silence) Well, you better actually talk to them! I don’t want to be paying for you to see someone if you aren’t going to actually use the time.

 

(Silence continues, doctor comes out and gets Sara)

 

DOCTOR:      Hello Sara. (Sara just stares at them.) Well, this is our first appointment. Is there anything you would like to say? Maybe you have a question for me? (Sara looks at the floor. She doesn’t respond) Hmmm? (Doctor gives time for Sara to talk)  Well? We have another 15 minutes. Do you really just want to sit here the whole time? (A little more time for Sara to respond) Okay. Well let’s make an appointment for next time. Next week. I’ll get the date and time with your mother then? Okay. I hope you realize I’m not that scary! 

 

(Sara moves to waiting room as Lauren enters. The doctor motions for Lauren to come speak with her. They converse in the office while Sara sits in the waiting room)

 

LAUREN:       What is this about? Not talking? Are you to cool to talk to someone?

 

SARA:            Mom! It’s not that. It’s weird. They have nothing to do with me. It’s none of there business about my life.

 

LAUREN:       Well that’s money wasted. You could have gotten something out of that, but no. You choose to be stubborn, a rebel. Is that the new “fad” or something” I can’t understand it.

 

SARA:            Shut up! You wouldn’t understand. You can’t understand anything unless it is perfect. Got news for you mother dear, nothing in this world is perfect, so sorry to let you down.

 

(Sara gets up and turns back on Lauren. Lauren looks at her for a bit then shakes head gets up and exits. Mike and Sara are in the waiting room before Sara’s next appointment.)

 

MIKE:              So, how was your day? (Silence) Did you have something good for lunch? (Silence) Yeah, there’s never anything good for lunch is there? (Mike laughs to himself) Well, you know your mother’s cooking, nothing good there. (Laughs to himself again) What’s up? Come on, aren’t you going to talk with me?

 

SARA:            Are you siding with Mom really? Do you think I have ‘issues?’ I think this is all a load of crap. Are you just taking me to get fixed?

 

MIKE:              Who says you’re broken?

 

(There is silence. After a few minutes Doctor enters taking Sara into the office. Mike exits.)

 

DOCTOR:      Hello again Sara. How are you today?

 

SARA:            Let’s make this clear; my life is none of your business. So stop pestering me.

 

DOCTOR:      I know I am just a boring and old. You probably think I am sitting here sizing you up and thinking of what medication I can put you on to make you “normal.”

 

SARA:                        Well aren’t you?

 

DOCTOR:      That’s not what I am about. I am here to listen and help you in anyway I can.

 

SARA:            You aren’t going to help me with anything.  This is stupid. I’m not confused about anything. I know who I am. I know where I want to go in life. It’s not like you are going to help me come to this great life changing epiphany!

 

DOCTOR:      Is that so?

 

SARA:            Yeah

 

DOCTOR:      Well you are here because your parents are making you. What do you think about that?

 

SARA:            It sucks. They are really dumb and don’t understand me. I know I sound like every other teenager, but it’s true. My parents don’t have the intellectually capacity to understand me not being Emily!

 

DOCTOR:      Who is this Emily?

 

SARA:                        My sister. She’s off in college somewhere now.

 

DOCTOR:      So your parents want you to be Emily?

 

SARA:            Something like that.

 

DOCTOR:      Why? What was Emily that you’re not?

 

SARA:            Everything. She is my opposite. She is beautiful. She was a cheerleader. She played basketball and field hockey. She was a great student. Straight A’s for her, nothing less. She was popular. She went out with a boy every weekend, sometimes even more than one boy. She is a tramp. She was the life of the party, probably still is. I imagine that’s why she went to college.  She still smokes drinks and probably does drugs, but Mom and Dad won’t hear it. They just see the good student, the cheerleader.

 

DOCTOR:      It sounds like you look down at her.

 

SARA:            I would give a lot to be as pretty as her, or to have the friends, the grades. That’s just not me though. I’m sorry, it’s just…she has everything. She has everything and has done nothing for it. She just gets it with a smile, (mutters) or doing something else.

 

DOCTOR:      Why do you need to look like her to be pretty? You are beautiful. You don’t need blonde hair and blue eyes to be pretty.

 

SARA:            Maybe. This isn’t the real problem. It’s, well, you can’t tell my parents what I say in here can you?

 

DOCTOR:      The only reason I can is if I have reason to believe you are going to hurt yourself or others.

 

SARA:            Okay. Well, I…like girls.

 

DOCTOR:      And?

 

SARA:            Did you not just hear me? My family would disown me if they knew that. My mother is always talking about how disgusting gays are. She tells them off when she sees them. She is a Catholic you know. She just…can’t accept some things.

 

DOCTOR:      I see. So you haven’t told your parents. Hmm, Are you seeing anyone?

 

SARA:            Actually yes.  Her name is Molly. We meet in secret a couple of times a weeks. I don’t really care about school. I want to be more involved with her life. She wants the same thing. She has told her parents all about me. They can’t wait to meet me. The problem, my mother would kill me if I told her.

 

DOCTOR:      You don’t think she would actually kill you, do you?

 

SARA:            Well no, but she would be really mad. She would hate Molly, if not the lesbian thing. Molly is well…she doesn’t care what anyone thinks. I love that about her. I’m such a wimp when it comes down to people. She gives me a boost in spirit. I feel like I actually matter when I see her.  She doesn’t even care that we can only see each other when we skip class.

 

DOCTOR:      It sounds like you really care about her.

 

SARA:                        Basically. She’s all I have.

 

DOCTOR:      Think about that. Do you think it is healthy to have one person be your everything? (Sara looks ashamed.) What comes along with that? I’m sorry to tell you our time is up. I’m glad you are talking. I think you got a lot out today. You did a good job. We’ll talk more about your mother and you being a lesbian next time. You okay with that?

 

SARA:            Yes. When is my next appointment?

 

DOCTOR:      Is next week, same time, good?

 

SARA:            Yeah, I guess this isn’t going to be so bad.

 

(Doctor exits, Lauren and Sara waiting for Sara’s next appointment.)

 

LAUREN:       So you and the doctor are finally talking and getting some things done now? I’m glad. I hope you get something out of this.

 

SARA:                        Yeah, right.

 

LAUREN:       Excuse me?

 

SARA:                        Nothing.

 

LAUREN:       You know that I want the best for you. Don’t give me that ‘you don’t really care’ attitude. I’ll be back to pick you up.

 

(Lauren exits. The Doctor enters and Sara follows them into their office.)

 

 

SARA:            I saw Molly the other day. (Pauses thinking) She was upset.

 

DOCTOR:      What did you guys talk about? What got her so upset?

 

SARA:            She is a very blunt personality. She doesn’t fear anything. The world is against her and her sexuality, she knows that. She doesn’t care.

 

DOCTOR:      The whole world isn’t like that.

 

SARA:            She keeps talking about meeting my parents and us getting together. I don’t know what I can do about it. My mother wouldn’t understand. I would be thrown out of my house. It’s not like I have anywhere else to go. I just want to make Molly happy! But I don’t want to ruin my life in the process. There’s just no way to balance this.

 

DOCTOR:      I see.

 

SARA:            I told her about having to see you. She didn’t like that my mother deemed me so unstable that I have to get help. She then went on a rant about having to keep us a secret. She wants me to get over my fear of rejection and come out of the closet.

 

DOCTOR:      What do you think about that?

 

SARA:            I want to. I want to be able to come out. I just don’t have the confidence to sit my parents down and tell them. They are just going to freak out and perhaps my mother would attempt to kill me!

 

DOCTOR:      You’re catastrophizing. Do you know what that means?

 

SARA:                        I am thinking of the worst possible scenario, yeah…

 

DOCTOR:      I don’t think your mother would kick you out. I think that if you give her time she will understand. You’re her daughter; she loves you and will be there for you.

 

SARA:            You’re missing the point.

 

DOCTOR:      She will accept you in time. She loves you and she will remember that even if you aren’t exactly what she was hoping for. No parent has a child without some surprises.

 

SARA:            How would I tell her though? Sit her down? Make her tea? ‘Hey Mom I’m coming out today. I have been seeing a girl for the last 6 months. I love her and you’re gonna deal with it.’? I can’t do that! Doesn’t anyone get it!? I can’t tell her.

 

DOCTOR:      You could have her join you in here and we could tell her together?

 

SARA:            That’s not going to help anything. I’ll still have to drive home with them and face them!

 

DOCTOR:      It was just an offer. I think it would help you to do it in a safe setting. It would give you a little support.

 

SARA:            I…It must be done, for Molly. I would be such a horrible girlfriend if I don’t do this. Not just for Molly. I need to do this for myself. I can’t live in such fear of my mother’s rejection. If she is going to cast me from her sight I need to get it over with. I can’t keep going like this. I need my father here too. It needs to be all done at once. When can the next appointment be?

 

(Sara and the Doctor exit. Lauren and Mike enter.)

 

LAUREN:       Sara has invited us to her next session with the doctor. I wonder why?

 

MIKE:              To give us an update on her progress. We need to be active in her therapy if it is going to help her.

 

LAUREN:       It just makes me wonder why. Hopefully he has made a break through as to why she is…the way she is!

 

MIKE:              Kids are kids, Lauren. Why can’t you just be happy with her the way she is?

 

LAUREN:       She is going nowhere, Mike! You know that just as well as I do. Stop fooling yourself and stop pretending that you are happy with her! You are just as disappointed as I am.

 

MIKE:              No. I love my daughter. I want what is best for her, just like you do. As parents it’s out job to be supportive of her. Can’t you see that you’re hurting your own daughter?

 

(Mike storms off. Lauren sits there in shock. Finally she gets up and follows him.)

 

LAUREN:       You just wait one minute!—

 

(Sara enters, while looking at the spot her parents left.)

 

SARA:            How can anyone deal with that? My parents never used to fight. It’s my fault. If I just had been what my mother wanted, if I could be Emily! They would still love each other. It is my fault they are not longer in love. It’s all my fault.

 

(Molly exits. Doctor and Lauren enter and sit. Lauren sits next to Sara. Doctor sits across from them.)

 

DOCTOR:      How have you been, Sara?

 

SARA:            I’m nervous. I haven’t been able to get this off my mind. I want to get it over with. I can’t stand the suspense any longer. This is going to be weird.

 

LAUREN:       What? What is going on? Why are you scared? Have you not been cooperating? I’m sorry—

 

MIKE:              Is that what she said? Did she say she wasn’t cooperating? No.

 

DOCTOR:      She has been doing very well. We have got a lot accomplished. Today is putting it all to work, that’s all. She wants you involved with the work we are doing.  Are you ready, Sara? (Sara nods in response.) Okay. Lauren, Mike, lets keep this simple, when Sara is talking, no interruptions. Remember no insulting each other. (Doctor looks at Sara while saying that.) We all agreed?

 

Lauren:           Of Course. (Mike nods.)

 

SARA:            Mom, Dad, just listen. I know you are going to have lots to say but try to wait ‘til I am done, please. I have known this for a while now. I have been afraid, literally afraid to tell you. You are so disappointed in me! I hear guys fighting about me all the time. I don’t see why can’t you be happy with me? I know I’m not Emily, but why does that mean I am nothing?

 

LAUREN:       Sara—

 

SARA:            Stop. I said I wanted you to let me finish. Don’t you ever listen? Hear me out. I have been seeing someone for 6 months now. I love her. I really do. I didn’t tell you and still wish I didn’t have to! I love her Mom. Her name is Molly.

(Lauren’s jaw drops)

She goes to my school. She does well. She’s not afraid like I am. She loves me too.  She wants to meet you. Every day she complains about my insistence that we have to keep us a secret. She wants to openly love me. She wants to be accepted into my life. You are a great part of my life. She wants to meet you. She wants to be a part of the good and bad. I kept telling her you wouldn’t understand, but she wants you to know. I want you to know. I want you to understand more than anything. Can you do that? Can you accept that I am a lesbian?  Or am I to forever be shunned because I am not your precious Emily? I’m not what you wanted.

 

LAUREN:       But—

 

SARA:            DID I SAY I WAS DONE? I know I am not what you want. I am not what you want. You aren’t the parents I would have picked either, but I love you anyways. Will you do the same for me?

 

LAUREN:       (Lauren is in shock. She is coming to realization and starts to cry.) How, how can this be? You are… I can’t say it!! You sinful little brat, you are mistaken. You don’t know what you are saying. You are young! You are naive! You don’t know what you are saying!

 

SARA:            (Yelling and crying herself.) Yes, I know what I am saying, Mother! You are the naive one! I know what I am feeling. I know what I am saying. I know that I am in love with another woman. Why can’t you just accept that without trying to guilt trip me?

 

                        (Silence, Mike is thinking.)

 

MIKE:              Lauren, take a deep breath. Sexuality is not a sin. It is not wrong in any way. Love is love. She knows what she is feeling. She knew you wouldn’t understand. That is why you are hearing this in a professional setting. Think before you speak to your daughter. What you are saying affects her more then you realize. You are the adult here. You need to act like one. (Lauren gets up and leaves.)

 

Sara. (Hands her a box of tissues) I’m sorry. She is reacting, well, like anyone who just heard something shocking would. She will calm down. She will accept you. She’ll learn tolerance. You have to forgive her. She can’t relate to what you are going through. You are sending her into this new experience too. She’ll get it eventually. I love you darling, more than you know. That is clear to me now. I haven’t made it known that I accept you. I don’t care if you aren’t a strait A student, I don’t care if you don’t have many friends. You are my daughter and I would never wish you to change a bit. Never! I love you Sara.

 

SARA:            Dad. (Sara gets up crosses room to him. Sara Hugs him and breaks down in sobs.)I love you Dad. All I ever wanted was to please you and Mom. All I ever wanted was to be accepted and loved.

 

(Dim lights, Mike and Lauren are sitting in the living room.)

 

MIKE:              So. Are you ready for this?

 

LAUREN:       Do I have a choice? This is for my daughter. This is for my family’s well-being. This needs to be done. I…I’ll be fine. I’ll never understand it. I don’t see how anyone can… (She closes her eyes to stop herself from beginning to cry.) I am ready to make a stand for Sara. She’s not Emily, but she is still my daughter.

 

MIKE:              Lauren, I am so proud of you right now. I’m here with you, never forget that. I am here with you. (Mike kisses Lauren and embraces her for a minute. The doorbell rings.) I guess it’s time.

 

LAUREN:       (Gives a weak smile.) I guess it is.

 

(Mike and Lauren exit stage. You hear them walk to the front door and open it. Molly answers from off stage.)

 

MOLLY:          It is so great to finally meet you!

 

LAUREN:       It’s nice to meet you too, Molly. (Voices fade) I’m Sara’s mother. Call me Lauren.

           

                        (Blackout)

 

 

 

 

 

 

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