KarMel Scholarship 2008

 

Poem

“Upperclass, White and Normal

By Jessica Collette

 

 

 

Desciption of Submission: “Poem about my experience and struggles with being bisexual in the community I grew up in.” - Jessica

 

Middle School:

Very feminine: jewelry, clothes, shoes, and make-up.

Very pretty: boyfriends, popular, and mysterious.

Very wealthy: dad’s engineering firm

 

6th Grade: pink sundresses and white mary-jane shoes.

                 A girl likes me??  Very flattered. Do I like her?

 

High School:

Very feminine: jewelry, clothes, shoes, and make-up.

Very pretty: boyfriends, popular, and mysterious.

Very wealthy: dad’s engineering firm

 

9th Grade: Discovered masturbation. Mind drifts to women. Can’t stop thinking about girls.

                  Am I gay? Do I like girls?

10th Grade: Yes. I like girls. Can I still like boys? Will my friends think I am weird?

                   Will my parents be okay with this? What will my brother and sister think?

                    Came out to friends and family.  Are they as okay with it as they say they

        are?—NO. 

        Stuggle. Denial. Self-rejection.

11th Grade: First Girlfriend. But I want the “normal” life. I want to have a husband and

       children.

 

College:

Very feminine: jewelry, clothes, shoes, and make-up.

Very pretty: boyfriends, popular, and mysterious.

Very wealthy: dad’s engineering firm

 

Boys and Girls. Boys or Girls. Who am I? What do I like?

I have an image to fit, but I don’t.

Bisexuality is not just something that happens at frat parties to please boys.

My friends think I am weird. My mom thought it was a phase.  I am stuck in the middle...

Constant conflict—sexual identity is split in two.

 

 

 

 

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